|
Jokes Forum Looking for a laugh and a giggle ? Post your jokes and gags here. Please add *Adult* to the subject title if the joke is of an adult nature. Anything obscene will be removed immediately. |
![]() |
|
Topic Tools |
#1
|
||||
|
||||
Boys night out, girls night out
New approval form to be completed in full before any solo night's out are undertaken.
APPLICATION FOR A NIGHT OUT WITH THE BOYS Name of Boyfriend/Fiancι/Husband: I request permission for a leave of absence from the highest authority in my life for the following period: Date: Time of departure: Time of return NOT to exceed: Should permission be granted, I do solemnly swear to only visit the locations stated below, at the stated times. I agree to refrain from hitting on or flirting with other women. I shall not even speak to another female, except as expressly permitted in writing below. I will not turn off my mobile after two pints, nor shall I consume above the allowed volume of alcohol without first phoning for a taxi AND calling you for a verbal waiver of said alcohol allowance. I understand that even if permission is granted to go out, my girlfriend/fiancι/wife retains the right to be pissed off with me the following week for no valid reason whatsoever. Amount of alcohol allowed (units) Beer Wine Liquor Total Locations to be visited: Females with whom conversation is permitted: IMPORTANT STRIPPER CLAUSE: Notwithstanding the female contact permitted above, I promise to refrain from coming within one hundred (100) feet of a stripper or exotic dancer. Violation of this Stripper Clause shall be grounds for immediate termination of the relationship. I acknowledge my position in life. I know who wears the trousers in our relationship, and I agree its not me. I promise to abide by your rules & regulations. I understand that this is going to cost me a fortune in chocolates & flowers. You reserve the right to obtain and use my credit cards whenever you wish to do so. I hereby promise to take you to a Robbie Williams concert, should I not return home by the approved time. On my way home, I will not pick a fight with any stranger, nor shall I conduct in depth discussions with the said entity. Upon my return home, I promise not to urinate anywhere other than in the toilet. In addition, I will refrain from waking you up, breathing my vile breath in your face, and attempting to breed like a (drunken) rabbit. I declare that to the best of my knowledge (of which I have none compared to my BETTER half), the above information is correct. Signed - Boyfriend/Fiancι/Husband: Request is: APPROVED DENIED This decision is not negotiable. If approved, cut permission slip below and carry at all times. " Permission for my boyfriend/fiancι/husband to be away for the following period of time: Date: Time of departure: Time of return: Signed Girlfriend/Fiancι/Wife: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- APPLICATION FOR A NIGHT OUT WITH THE GIRLS Name of Girlfriend/Fiancιe/Partner/Wife: IM GOING OUT, O.K. Signed: (me) |
#2
|
||||
|
||||
Sounds about right
![]() ![]() |
![]() |
Bookmarks |
«
Previous Topic
|
Next Topic
»
|
|
![]() |
||||
Topic | Topic Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
Girls Night Out | PhiloVance | Jokes Forum | 1 | April 13th, 2009 10:39 PM |
Internet slow at night, only night | EliteMarine | Internet / Browsers | 2 | September 28th, 2007 03:47 PM |
The Difference Between Girls and Boys | dammit | Jokes Forum | 2 | October 9th, 2004 10:12 PM |
Girls night out *adultish* | modmidget | Jokes Forum | 3 | October 20th, 2003 05:39 AM |
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 06:30 PM.